Rene Gavic was a 22-year-old newlywed when Rich Barbeau hired her to be the head track coach for Visitation School in Mendota Heights. Over the years she assumed many other positions: math teacher, Upper School dean of students, Upper School director, head of school. She is now 59, a grandma of three and retiring to care for her husband who has Alzheimer’s.
“God leads you to these places and you can’t totally understand,” Gavic said. “When I think about how many people have that great fortune to spend their entire career in one place —that doesn’t happen. Now it’s actually frowned on: You’re not capable. But for me, I never felt stuck. I always had opportunities for growing. There was just an openness.”
Q) In many ways you grew up at Vis.
A) My earliest memory is just being so in awe of the students. I was walking on campus, interacting with young women who carried themselves with such poise and grace and confidence. It stood out to me as a young woman: I want what they have. There is something different here.
The team really cared about each other and supported one another. We qualified for state, and I looked over and the (Visitation) Sisters were walking from the parking lot carrying a big V flag in full navy habits, and they were so excited to support the young women and me as a coach. It’s an image that’s etched in my mind. They didn’t really know what they were showing up for, but they knew they were showing up for something that mattered. The sisters always believed in the best of you and called you to your best self. They didn’t see the shortcomings or the failures. They saw what was possible.
After a Board of Conduct meeting one time, Sister Marie Therese (Conaty, a former superior at Visitation) looked at me and said: “Well, honey, you don’t always have to hit them over the head with a hammer. You have other tools in your toolbox.” What she was saying was: the way you conducted that meeting was not effective. You can do it differently, and you are capable of doing it differently. And that’s what I have continued to do, in my own ways, with colleagues, making sure they know I believe in their abilities to do something better, because that’s what I always felt with the sisters.
Q) That leads to being coachable, a word your colleagues use to describe you. What does that mean to you?
A) It’s understanding that you have the ability to grow. It’s not being afraid to be vulnerable to the areas where you can continue to improve and accepting feedback from a place of assuming positive intent, not being defensive. I’m not saying that’s easy. But when I look at my experience, I was surrounded by people who were living this Salesian calling in a real, authentic way. It wasn’t just words on paper. It’s a way of life, of interacting — heart-to-heart relationships.
Q) That Salesian spirituality comes from Visitation’s founders, St. Jane de Chantal and St. Francis de Sales, which “Salesian” is derived from, and it encompasses little virtues like kindness, joyful optimism, liberty of spirit and gentle strength. Your tenure at Vis has been a case study in drawing leadership lessons from those virtues.
A) Sister Marie Therese used to say that gentle strength is often misunderstood as passive or non-confrontational. She said, “Oh, no, no — there’s nothing as strong as gentleness. But gentle strength means doing and saying the hard things in a way that people can hear them.”
Q) As head of school, you had ample opportunity to put that to use.
A) No matter how much you think you know about any given situation, I have always been surprised by perspectives I hadn’t considered before. That may not change what you think you can do, but if you’re not open, if you’re stuck in concrete in how you’re going to handle something, you are going to miss it.”
Q) Now you’re preparing for a new chapter — to assist your husband and also usher in your successor, whose suitcase sits here in the corner of your office. Jennifer Bigelow officially becomes head of school on July 1.
A) She’s so excited about this community and its mission. I told her, “I’ll be that annoying one, ‘I’m right here if you need me!’” I was mentored, and you just want to be that for the next person. I’m not feeling territorial. It was not mine. This continues. The story is so vibrant and exciting. I’m just one tiny, tiny page in this book — maybe a paragraph. To know that I got to be a part of that is huge!
Q) Still, transitions can be hard.
A) I’m not leaving as I thought I would. It’s been more abrupt because of what God calls of me. I had in my mind all of these things that I was going to have tied up in a nice bow, and I keep working to tie them, but they keep unraveling. As women, we want that perfection, for everything to feel very complete, but this is never going to be that because it’s never ending. You’re always going to be in the middle of it. But OK, you bring it to where you can bring it, and then you confidently say, “I trust you, you’ve got this.”
When I look at where I am now on the journey with my husband and his Alzheimer’s diagnosis, I realize what I have learned in these last four decades is preparing me to live this next chapter: All of the little virtues of staying in the present moment, finding that joyful optimism. I know I wouldn’t be handling this without the love and the mentorship that I have gained through my time here. I’m feeling so blessed — that while this is a hard moment in our lives, we can meet it head on because we are prepared from the little virtues and from our faith base.
Q) You became a grandma during your first year as head of school. Now your fourth grandchild is on the way.
A) For this one I’m hoping to be a little more of a presence. I just got to be a surprise reader for my first-grade granddaughter, and the look on her face when I walked through that door — I would do anything to see that look again! I’m walking toward that.
Q) What will you be doing for fun this summer?
A) Cards, pickleball, I’m getting back into running. I’m looking forward to reading just for pleasure. I want to have unhurried time with family.
One thing I gave up as head of school is gardening. I love to garden, but it requires work in May and June, which I’ve missed when I’m here. I have perennial gardens that I had to let go. Otherwise, you feel upset about it. So, I’m really looking forward to resurrecting my gardens.
Q) Gardening can be a spiritual exercise.
A) You’re putting things in. You have no idea whether it’s going to take, where it is, what it’s going to look like. Those first spring days of seeing those shoots popping up and then three weeks later, these plants — you just have to marvel at God’s goodness.
