Have you ever thought about why you are Catholic? I started reflecting on it after being invited to write an essay for The Catholic Spirit. I did not want to settle with a quick and shallow answer, so I tried searching deeper in my soul.
What is love? Love is willing the good of the other. There’s an element of desire and an element of choice. I must desire good things for the other person. I must be willing to choose (to do) good things for the other person. To fulfill both things, I must know what is good for the other person.
Before turning 25, I believed the best way to handle trials and suffering in my life was to brush them off and deal with them on my own. Pain would just keep growing and I would have to manage it myself. It was only when I entered the adoration chapel, gazed upon Jesus in his true divinity within the monstrance, and allowed him to open my eyes to his love for me and his true nature, that I truly understood who he is.
Raised Catholic, my parents brought us to Mass every Sunday. I still remember driving to the nearest town for Mass even if we were out camping far away from home. What an amazing seed they planted within me.
Depending on when this question was asked through the different stages of my life, my answer would have varied. At times, I might have said I was born into it; at other times, I might have said I didn’t know. But now, I can say with certainty that I am Catholic because I am broken. Through my brokenness and the lowest points of my life, God has reached out and shown me the way.
I had acknowledged the Lord here and there since I was little, but I was confused about who God was. I did not understand what he desired for me or that I could have a personal relationship with him. I saw him more as someone distant who I’d pray to if I was scared or to remedy something bad that was happening.
Every day while driving us to school, my mom would have us recite the Morning Offering. At the time, I didn’t know it was the Morning Offering, I just thought my mom had a real knack for coming up with good prayers. It wasn’t until much later, during a silent retreat at Demontreville (Jesuit Retreat House in Lake Elmo), that I realized there was much more depth and tradition to this morning prayer ritual.
When people ask me “Why are you Catholic?” my typical response is that it’s very similar to falling in love — there is an initial attraction, and with time, prayer and discernment, a conscious commitment can be made.
Sharing why I am Catholic is always exciting but daunting — there are so many things I could talk about. If I were to summarize my experience in one sentence, I would say that I am Catholic because I’ve fallen in love with God as a person, and I couldn’t imagine being separated from him.
