I found myself challenged to write this column to match The Catholic Spirit theme for this issue: Catholic family life and intentional living. I had to step back and reimagine what family life is like today.
For me, growing up in an American Irish Catholic family being Catholic was very important. We regularly attended Mass, attended Catholic school, prayed the rosary as a family, said grace before the meal, had crucifixes hanging in the house and started out any journey in the car with, “Jesus, Mary, and Joseph be with us on our way.” Mom had holy water and blessed candles at hand so we would be ready for any storm that might come our way. These externals proclaimed that we were Catholic and each of us expressed in our own way what this meant interiorly.
Family life is a bit more challenging today than it was in the 1960s and 1970s. I feel old when I look back and see how free we were to live and enjoy life. We were able to run around in the neighborhood and enjoy our neighbors. We had no cellphones, one television for the house and a ringing bell that called us in for lunch or dinner. We all had our chores to do and no allowance. Respect was always to be shown in the house. We ate dinner together every night.
Today, Catholic family life is different. There is a stronger need for intentional living as sports and activities have stronger priorities and distance separates families in this mobile society. Catholic education is not always an option as tuition costs have risen and more options for education have surfaced.
The externals of Catholic faith do not seem to be that important today as sharing a meal together might happen once a week and children have become more dependent on their cellphones and social media. The culture of family has changed, and it appears one must be intentional in family living to bring the presence of faith into the home.
Intentionally living one’s faith and developing a personal relationship with Jesus Christ can still be the center of a Catholic family. It is the duty of Catholic parents who baptize their children to raise them in the practice of the faith. Too often this might be left to others, such as Catholic schools, faith formation programs and grandparents. If the faith is not practiced and reinforced in the home, it can be lost on the children. Our children and youth seem to question their faith more readily and ask questions that can be difficult to answer. Still, while trust and faith in institutions are waning, God remains an important part of many lives.
Families are called to discern what or who is the center of their family life. Growing up, I was reminded that faith and charity begin at home. We learned to pray, share, respect and honor our parents. There are abundant opportunities to learn to give in charity of our time, treasure or gifts. Living intentionally, families can make the effort to serve the community through their parishes. Children can learn from their parents as they see them active as Eucharistic ministers, lectors, greeters and other areas of volunteering in the parish. In the community, families can do spring cleaning and donate items they do not need to local parishes, life care centers or other organizations that distribute to those in need. Parents can encourage their children to participate in mission trips or help with service projects at school. Intentional living is making time for what is important and encouraging the household to prioritize.
So, what is Catholic family life like? It is intentional living, keeping Jesus Christ at the center of the family and living the Gospel message in a way that may be countercultural. We all have preconceived ideas of what the ideal Catholic family looks like. We can never live up to this ideal. So be creative and intentional, using the imagination together as a family to live in the love that Jesus has for us and how that love can spill out into the world by the way we love and serve others.
